Practice Makes Patterns

Spoiler alert - Practice does NOT make perfect.

Practice makes patterns. Patterns are the foundation of your habits to create the lifestyle you really want - they are what makes or breaks your habit, pun intended. 🤭😘

Contrary to popular misconception, creating or breaking a habit isn't about 21 days of doing something repetitively. Yes, consistency matters. Most people understand HOW to create a new habit. You want to lose weight - you eat healthy food and you move more than you are currently moving - preferrable a balanced exercise program that intentionally strengthens your body, mind, and spirit. 

What I hear often, and have certainly awaken to myself, is the thought of “how did I get HERE”. Here being amid an unhealthy habit that gets in the way of moving forward on something that is truly important to you. 

If all it took to change a habit were the steps to make it happen - the weight loss industry would not be a multi-billion dollar industry, personal trainers would have no one to train, setting and getting goals would be as “easy” as 1-2-3, just follow the steps and “Voila!” - you're running marathons, you're eating healthier choices, you're no longing hitting the snooze and rushing around like a roadrunner to get out of the house. A new habit is formed, your most desirable changes, easy-peasy 1-2-3.

Ha! If only our brains were designed to accept change that easily. But our beautiful, complex brains don't work that way. Your magnificent brain will resist change before it leans into something new. Let that sink in -deep.

 This is one reason habits are so challenging to create, or break.

 Wait I felt hesitation - was your first thought to blame yourself? Your inability to have enough of “something” - plug in what you think you don't have enough of.

How many times have you said to yourself - “I lack discipline, if only I had willpower, what’s with me, maybe I can't have this” when the truth is, you have more than ‘enough’ to create this habit. Here's what that looks like, focus on what you want to change and how you are thinking and feeling about it. When you give your attention to the patterns - you can create any new habit. 

I hear the massive sigh of relief for those of you who, like me, have struggled to create habits that are important to you. 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

If this is you - I've got you right here, right now. 

When you change a habit, you're also changing patterns. When you only focus on WHAT needs to change (like, I need to start exercising) and do not include changing the patterns behind what keeps you from creating that habit (like the thought/emotion, I feel overworked and deserve to sit on the couch instead of exercising) you're running a marathon in quicksand. Ok - a little dramatic but there are moments I truly felt this way (insert emoji of a woman running through quicksand with frustrated face).

To make a habit become automatic, first become aware of the patterns that support that habit. Most people use the terms habits and patterns interchangeably, but they are not the same thing - they are different - and here's how this distinction will benefit you to get your desired change. Let’s take a deeper dive into how habit creation takes more thought than brawn, the equation of success >🧠+🎬= new habit.

 A habit is a routine of behavior – something done regularly or repetitively, action that is automatic that tends to occur sub-consciously. These are things you do without fail, without thought, without brain power. Think of a habit this way:

Habit is what you do.

There's a trigger that tells your brain to go into automatic mode and prompt a behavior. You get up - you brush your teeth, you sit down at your desk you read emails before anything else, you wake up open your eyes and your hand reaches for the phone - seconds later you're scrolling through social, or you wake up light a candle, sit cross legged on the floor and begin to meditate before anyone else is your world is awake. 

 A pattern is an expression of unconscious beliefs, informed by experiences – positive or negative, narratives based on our perception or observations of the world inform our patterns (some serve us, some not so much). 

 Pattern is what you are thinking or feeling.

Patterns are deeper than habits. They are the mechanism of change for any habit. To create a habit (automated action) the first step is to break away from the hold the unconscious patterns have over your reactions and actions. Try this experiment.

 What is the habit you want to create or break?

📝 Observe the patterns that hold a habit in place or will be necessary to create a new habit. Observe your thoughts, beliefs, and perception of the patterns you hold around a habit you want to break or create. 

Example: You want to create a habit of working out after work. You believe when you finish a day of work crashing on the couch is a well-deserved treat for putting in a hard days work. Your thought is: I deserve a treat after a hard day of work. You Observe: Other colleagues go home and crash on the couch and binge Netflix. 

🧠Acknowledge what needs to be adjusted. Identify the beliefs and thoughts you need to make this change. At some point these thoughts and beliefs served you, this is an exercise to reassess if they are still aligned with your needs. 

Example: You write out the patterns (thoughts, beliefs, what you need to observe to shift your perception) you can practice that would support the habit of working out every day after work. 

🎬Take action by practicing new patterns. (Here's the experiment part.) Experiment with practicing new patterns, beliefs, perceptions, thoughts you need to create this new habit. Find a way to have them in front of you - on your phone, index card reminder, set a timer. 

Example: You “practice” Your new belief:  A hard day at work deserves a physical release (movement/exercise) to release stress and gain mental clarity. Your new thought: I feel better after I move - more so than crashing on the coach immediately following work. New Observation: I go to the park after work and see so many people moving and laughing (you're changing how you see your world, creating a new experience).

The new patterns should be something you believe and that you can practice until it becomes your identity - your habit. 

 If your patterns of thoughts around desired habits remain unchanged, your life will continue to unfold much as it has previously, same patterns - same results. Practicing new patterns supports the habits you want to create.

 There is immense power in practicing new patterns when you are changing habits. The biggest take away here is YOU have the power and control to create a new habit by becoming aware of your patterns and deciding to create new patterns that support your desired change. 

Here's to practicing new patterns!